BOOM! That’s a mouthful for a title, hey?! Legit though, this cake is grain-, gluten-, dairy-, egg-, sugar- and nut-free! And it doesn’t taste like absolute shit either however, be forewarned, protein-rich baked goods don’t taste like regular baked goods either. They’re a taste you’ll have to get used to.
Andréa over at Andréa’s Protein Cakery came up with this recipe and I’m just another one of her loyal followers that wanted to try something new. I am a lover of all baked goods like cakes, pies, cupcakes, donuts, cookies – ALL THE TREATS. “Tarted up little whores”, haha this cartoon makes me laugh too.
Seriously, they get me every time. I love having muffins and cupcakes in the house because they’re a fast go-to on the days I’m on the move. Only problem with that is I have to count them towards my carb macros (obvs) and that usually means I’m short on proteins but with this recipe, my protein macros go up instead. Huzzah!
This is in fact a cake recipe that has a delicious looking version of Andréa’s Cashew Whipped Cream on top but I don’t have any cashews in the house right now so I won’t attempt making it this time BUT it’s for sure on my to-do list because it looks and sounds so good. I’ll prob just end up spreading on (or eat with a spoon) this Dark Chocolate Almond Butter which is just like icing in a jar anyway. Costco is my best friend, really, they carry amazing icing-in-a-jar products plus they always support my decisions and they make me lunch for under $3. Win-win. Me and Costco are tight.
So anyways, this cake is five ingredients total. That’s all. Yep, not lying to you. And they’re not crazy obscure ingredients either like psyllium husks or xantham gum. Who stocks that shit anyway?! Andréa has a cool looking recipe for basic bread posted also but it calls for psyllium husks and unflavoured whey so I need to go forth and search for those before I can make it. Surprisingly, unflavoured whey is super hard to come across in my parts and I don’t even know where I’ll find psyllium husks…thankfully, there’s the internet.
Dump all five ingredients into a bowl and mix them up. Then the real recipe says to pour the batter into two 9″ pans lined with parchment paper but I decided to make them into muffins instead. They’re more user-friendly for me that way and I wasn’t topping them with the cream this time anyhow.
I scooped all my batter into muffin tins lined with silicone baking cups (got them at the M&M store in Las Vegas, best purchase ever) and baked in a 325F oven for 15 minutes. I actually had to bake mine longer because there’s something wrong with my oven and whenever a recipe says 15 minutes to bake, it actually takes my oven closer to 25 or 30 minutes to complete.
IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: Don’t overcook them. I’ve overcooked protein baking before and it has the potential to crush bones or break glass.
SO here’s the nitty gritty. There nutrient information per muffin is posted below and it’s not incorrect. 34.7g of protein PER MUFFIN with only 8g of carbs and 3g of fat. BOOYAH macros, take that! You’ll have to alter it if you add a schmear of the chocolate almond butter but that’s no biggie. The info is on the side of the jar.
Chocolate Protein Cake (Muffins)
Yield: 12 Muffins or 2-9″ cakes
2 cups chocolate whey protein powder
1/2 cup cocoa
1-1/2 cups applesauce
2 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
Happy baking! Enjoy, Kim.